The reason why....

The reason why....

Fuck this. I want to give up. I want to delete this whole website and never try to create one again. I don't have the kind of money that Wix wants me to throw down to make this part better and that part better. I don't have the time to be doing everything from scratch but in order to do it from a professional template then I have to have money. MONEY MONEY MONEY It comes and goes constantly and I don't even know where it goes anymore. My daughter has wore the same outfit to school for the last 3 days because I'm dead broke. I just don't know what to do anymore and all this website is doing is taking my fucking time and what little money I do have sitting aside. For what? Not to help me. I'm not making a penny and I've had this website for awhile now. A long while.

That is how I think a few times a week. This week its so much worse. When I got out of prison and wanted to do something for myself it was this and now this is failing. I'm failing my daughter as a mother and can't even get her new clothes. That amazing child that never talks back, literally never, just says, "It's okay we will just get them when we can". I can't handle this anymore. I'm busting my ass when I come to work and go out of town and miss her and get absolutely nothing in return at this point. I would usually say that everything is going to be okay to myself and to everyone else to myself but I don't feel like its going to be. I need help, I need guidance in the direction I need to go. I don't need a handout or sympathy I need legitimate help. SOMEONE PLEASE! I am more then willing to help myself with a positive attitude and continue that no matter what life throws at me but I need someone finally. I can't do this alone right now. I'm breaking and I'm breaking really hard. I don't want to let my beautiful daughter down and I don't want to let myself down either.

Thank you for listening.

I'm not out of my funk yet but I feel a lot better. Even though nothing in my life has changed in the last couple days, I still feel a lot better. I need to continue to look at the bright side of things in life and not the bad. I mean I may not have any money to put food in my mouth or clothes on my daughters back but I do get free breakfast while I'm here and its AMAZING!